My Happy Finds – A place for Love, Life and Laughter

How To Have Success With The Ladies (One Guy’s Opinion)

Posted on: August 19, 2009 | By Maigal

It's time to hook upl

It's time to hook up.

I asked my handsome and charming guy friend the other day on how he gets all the women in NYC?  He submitted this article to me.   Check out his advice.

I do not claim to be NY’s biggest player by any means. I don’t date around with multiple girls every night of the week. I do however go out a lot, and have seen, experienced, and heard of enough things to offer my 2 cents on what does and doesn’t work with the woman in this great city of ours.

  1. Let’s just throw this out there, nice guys finish last. It’s been said before and will be said again, but no where is this more true than in NY. This isn’t the cow-fields of Iowa. The women here are not grazing sheep, looking for Mr. Dependable to settle down with and begin the birthing process at age 19. Women here are sophisticated, like challenges, marry later in life, date around, and in general want an adventurous man. In a city as busy as NY, if the man doesn’t keep up to speed with the pace of the lifestyle here, he’ll be left way behind.
  2. Dress Fashionably. I’m not talking about sporting the newest line from Armani and shopping exclusively at Barney’s. Just be well put together. Women are 10x more perceptive of the clothes a man wears. Even a really good looking guy, if he were to come into a bar wearing cut-off jean shorts and an oversized tank top with food stains, has NO chance of hooking up with any women at the bar. Now, take the reverse and have a really good-looking girl (say Jessica Alba) walk into a bar wearing that same outfit, 99% of the men would still sleep with her. What does this say, men are pigs, or are we just less materialistic? Either way, try to look well put together. I think guys that wear tapered jeans should just put a sign on their back that says, “I don’t plan on getting laid tonight, so don’t bother talking to me”.
  3. Confident without being cocky, psychotic, creepy, needy, etc. I once remember going to an Asian event and witnessing this psychotic guy, we’ll call him Simon (not real name), who would literally walk around the bar like a robot and try to approach every woman with the simple line, “Hello, I’m Simon, I’m single, who are you?” Did this work? Hell no. The guy was psychotic, and I’m pretty sure by the end of the night, every woman realized this as well. The funny thing is, the guy was a good looking guy who was dressed pretty well, and under most circumstances should have had plenty of ladies to choose from. Just don’t be psychotic. Confidence is definitely the #1 non-physical quality women look for. That and money, but I suppose if you have a shit load of cash, you have a lot of reasons to be confident.
  4. Sense of humor. I’ve found that you know you are doing well with a girl when you have her laughing with you. Not laughing at you, but with you. A good joke, funny story of shit going on around you, or just witty banter is what it’s all about. Women like nice conversation. A note on this subject, the younger the woman, the less interesting the conversation will be. Despite some 21 yr. old girls being really good looking and incredibly naïve, having a conversation with them is like pulling teeth. So frustrating and often really boring. Older women are definitely more interested in a nice conversation and will have a lot more to offer in that department. I guess younger the woman, the more basic the conversation. I think these 21 yr. old’s only care about the car you drive anyway, so go ahead and lie to them and tell them you drive something nice. Who cares.
  5. Aggressive. At some point in the night you’ll need to be aggressive and take the reins. Whether that’s suggesting to hit up the dance floor, meeting for a drink some other night, asking for her number, or inviting her back to your place to check out your interior design work, you’ll need to take action to make things happen. Sitting back and thinking something good will happen usually results in absolutely nothing happening. Worse thing that happens, you get rejected.

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Comments

8 Responses to “How To Have Success With The Ladies (One Guy’s Opinion)”

  1. Wade M
    August 19th, 2009 @ 10:11 am

    Good list. I know some guys who would start by going up to the prettiest girl first but at the end of the night, they would go for whoever are left… usually the ugliest one…

  2. Wesley
    August 19th, 2009 @ 10:49 am

    “Let’s just throw this out there, nice guys finish last.”

    This depends on which girl you are dating. You can be nice but you need substance.

    If you are only nice you will not get anywhere with a girl by being dependable.

    But it’s true if the girl is like 20s, they want someone adventurous.

    So all you guys who are just nice and can’t get anyone in your 20s… just save your money till you are 30 something… because by the time girls turn to 28+ they all want security and marriage… and if you got the goods they will take you. It’s just how the world works at least in New York City.

    Save your money … you can be ugly asian and still get girls if you got money lol.

    As for Caucasian well you can be ugly … asian girls still dig ya … no money necessary.

  3. Alvin Lin
    August 19th, 2009 @ 8:26 pm

    Sometimes, girls just want a good fuck.

    And playing the shy guy definitely won’t let you show your stuff, if you even got anything to show.

  4. Rex
    August 19th, 2009 @ 10:59 pm

    handsome and charming friend… did u guys hook up? u kno girls n guys can never be just friends especially if u think he’s handsome!

  5. Maigal
    August 20th, 2009 @ 7:21 am

    Rex, that’s a personal question. I have plenty of guy friends that are strictly friends.

  6. lillianna
    August 20th, 2009 @ 8:28 am

    Reading these blogs, makes me miss my old partying and dating scene. You guys get to have all the fun.

  7. Rex
    August 20th, 2009 @ 10:27 pm

    are all ur guy friends “charming n handsome” too?? u can admit it if u secretly want to sleep wit him. guys luv aggressive women!

  8. Ross
    September 1st, 2009 @ 11:53 pm

    women is so different.they have better self control than men.if its simply friendship,it remains that way while men are aggressive.
    like i said,back in ancestral days.women are submissive and men are always agressive but then,it the woman who gets to pick which guy.
    try to notice the animal kingdom.the male species creates a different kind of rituals to attract a potential female.however,the female has the final say regarding which one to pick and of course,its always the best one.

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